Spam belongs on bread, not in your inbox!

Well, at least I think spam goes on bread. I am not even sure what spam is. I have never tried to eat it. The idea of meat in a square, squeezed into a little can is a little squirmy to me. People have told me that you fry it. That does not make it any more appetizing to me. It is as yucky to me as fried bologna. When I was in 6th grade, I was totally in love with my best friend’s brother. I followed him around like a love sick puppy.

Then came the fried bologna incident.

My friend and I were sitting at the table doing girly best friend things when in walked this adonis brother of hers. He proceeded to fry a peice of bologna in a pan. I was appaled. What was this? It stank, it looked weird and frankly the idea of “mechanically seperated beef and chicken parts” is a very disgusting sounding process. How could someone this wonderful ( in my pre-pubescent eyes) be eating something so alien and freaky??????

Anyhow, I digress.

What I am getting at is the idea of spamming emails. Even this blog gets spammed responses every day. Do I want designer shoes at discount prices? Do I want a longer, um, you know. Do I want to impress her with my manhood (hehe). I am sure you all are getting the very same emails. We all have a myspace account and thank god for the “private” editing. Before this handy detail, I can’t believe all the crap that was sent. “Get a free Macy’s card!” “Get legal bud!” “Get a laptop for absolutely nothing!” This one was especially great: The “Hi, I am writing you from my friends account, but IM me at this account so I can show you my pictures!”

What are we, stupid or somethin?????

Are these robots, or real people doing one hell of a viral marketing scam? I would love to know. If anyone out there has a clue about this, please clue me in.

As I said, if we MUST have spam in our lives–PLEASE, put it on bread!